‘sup with the canucks?!

wtf happened there? 150 people hospitalized? can you say losers — with a big L! (and not ’cause they lost the cup.)

well, at least we now know that white folks can riot.

rioting over sports — wins or losses — has got to be one of the dumbest things i can think of. i mean, how are they going to react if (when) there’s hyper-inflation (coming soon to an economy near you) and they can’t afford to buy bread? at least in that case rioting — or protests, anyway — would be understandable. but over a game?? please.

now that i’m talking about sports, can i just say: sports are dumb. dumb, dumb, dumb.

i know a lot of you prolly like watching|playing sports — and i know there’s all that group cohesiveness business — and i know it’s a proxy for war — but still, what a colossal waste of everyone’s time!

i can maybe see if you actually play a sport — that might be fun while you’re hanging out with pals — but sitting around watching other people play? and paying money for for the privilege?? nope. don’t get it.

plus, i can never understand why anyone can root for, say, the ny yankees or the chicago bulls when most of the players aren’t new yorkers or chicagoans. i just don’t get it. it’d be like rooting for mercenaries in a war your country was fighting. sure you might like ’em to win, but it’s not like your own people are fighting.

i always thought professional (and college, for that matter) teams should just get renamed the blue team or the red team or whatever. now i see from steve sailer that that’s what the chariot teams used to be called back in old constantinople (under emperor justinian). at least that makes some sense! as opposed to pretending or imagining that there’s anything new yorkan about any of the ny yankees players.

why couldn’t we have come up with some other activity that would promote group cohesiveness and competition that would’ve been useful? like, let’s see which group can construct the biggest and bestest aqueduct first! or a space race! oh, wait. we did that. and lost. (did anyone riot then?) but maybe we could do it some more anyway!

my father always likes to lament about all the wasted human energy that has gone into wars when instead we could’ve done something useful like colonize mars or something. (he doesn’t get biology, but that’s ok.) i always like to retort that he should think about all the gazillions of wasted man hours that have gone into sports! if we would just quit running around after little balls in silly games, then we could really get something done! (maybe.)

/rant (~_^)

(note: comments do not require an email. no, i never was a cheerleader. how did you guess?)


  1. I’m reminded of some things John Derbyshire said about different people’s interests (middle section of the page, the question and answer in which he says, among other things, “As Jane Austen observed, ‘One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.’ Same with interests.”). Some people like to collect coins. Some people like sports. As Derbyshire says, some people even like science and biology and genetics!

    I bet some people think coin collecting, or being interested in human biodiversity, or other hobbies and interests are a “waste” of time and human energy.

    But wouldn’t you rather celebrate the, dare I say, diversity of human interests?

    (I have to admit, professional sports would make more sense to me too if players for, say, a Cincinnati team had to be Cincinnatians born and bred. But you and I wouldn’t be sports fans anyway; so I can understand if the sports world doesn’t care about our opinion on the subject.)


  2. @chillingworth – “But wouldn’t you rather celebrate the, dare I say, diversity of human interests?”

    yeah, well, most of the time — or maybe half of the time — i’m happy to celebrate the diversity of human interests. but on days when hockey fans beat up on people, i feel less generous towards all the sports fanatics out there. (~_^)

    also, if i think too much about it, i do just get annoyed at all the wasted energy (apart from the group cohesion stuff — in that sense it’s not wasted energy). if i thought too much about coin collectors, i might get annoyed at them, too. (h*ll. i get annoyed at myself when i think about all the time wasting i do!)

    so, i try not to think too much about any of these things. (^_^)


  3. Any sport not involving a gun is not worth my time. Unless hiking is a sport, but I’d say it isn’t because I can never tell if I’ve won.

    Naw, I’m just being modest. I *always* win at hiking.


  4. I would like to hear a good theory on the appeal of sports based on evolutionary thinking. In particular, I can understand why women should want to watch men compete in order to identify the most fit men. Yet men are bigger sports fans than women. Why is that? The appeal for males could be a few possibilities that I can think of:

    1) Men watch other men compete in order to choose who to follow.

    2) Men watch other men (chosen as reps for a territory) compete in hopes the reps of their territory will win and therefore they will feel safer.

    3) Men watch competing men in order to learn how to compete.

    To put it another way: What instinct is being hijacked to get men to watch sporting matches in which they have no real stake in the outcome? What selected for that instinct?


  5. @randall – “What instinct is being hijacked….”

    that seems most likely to me, too — that some instinct is being hijacked. i vote for #1 on your list there. i’m picturing all the members in a troupe of chimps watching a battle between an alpha and a challenger — waiting and watching to see who wins and, therefore, who they’ll be following.

    additionally, tho, it does seem likely that feelings related to group cohesiveness might have been selected for here — even down through the millennia of sports watching (ugh — what a thought!). just like going to church every sunday with everyone else seems to work out good for everyone in the group, maybe monday night football does the same. weirder things have happened in nature. (maybe.)


  6. I am so with you about the Sports Assholes, Ma’am! The local book store just had to cut back on its hours, and the Sphincter (sports) bar two shops away is doing just fine. The Italiian Worthless Ice shop which is in-between them is doing a land-office business, as well.

    Do not people want to use their heads these days, or what?


  7. “that some instinct is being hijacked”

    A lot of ancient battles involved champions i.e. a tough guy from one side would step up and issue a challenge and someone from the other army would meet him in between the lines. Famous examples are David vs Goliath and Achilles vs Hector. The Romans had a special title and medal for a general who killed the enemy general in single combat.


  8. I’ve never really watched group sports, except a couple times, and the only reason I was interested was because we decided we’d gamble on the teams.

    I do like watching fighting sports though. I don’t think it’s to “choose who to follow.” I would look for the fighter that was the coolest, and when I was little I wanted to BE like the fighter. But as I got older, I wanted to be the one that killed the fighter and went on to be the next cool fighter, but even better. I don’t mean literally kill lol

    And the “choose to follow” thing doesn’t apply to sports I think. If the Heat loses a game. Those that live in Miami don’t suddenly jump ship and start following the Lakers. I think some men live vicariously through their teams, or fighters when watching. Or they just love to watch a great fight, the same reason they like watching huge explosions and shoot-outs in action movies. It’s just cool lol


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